When You Weren't Listening...

Days like this, deceitfully beautiful,

when the sun shines bright and crisp across the steel blue sky,

the wind whips and bites, 

swallowing rays of warmth,

burrowing deep down through skin and bone.

it's this deception,

my legs bigger,

my jeans tighter

my hair thinner,

that burns.

My green eyes are masked, clouded, dull. 

Yet fire surges, like poison, through every cell,

every thought.

In all my remembering, I have forgotten.